Journey 296: Open to Everything, Attached to Nothing Meets Real Estate

My journey the past few years has been amazing. It has been characterized by growth, releasing regrets and old stuck energy from my past, and releasing as well anxiety about my future. I have no control over  the past or the future, and I realized how much precious energy was being wasted by dwelling needlessly on either. A great deal of freedom, joy and peace has accompanied me as I travel, and new opportunities have opened up, and my creative side has reappeared. 

As my life has shifted, I’ve wondered whether being a realtor was going to be compatible with my journey. Having been in real estate for 13 years, I can attest that this can be a very stress filled occupation. I can spend a lot of time helping clients and have it all fall apart literally at the closing table. Realtors only get paid when they successfully complete a transaction. No fully completed closing, no paycheck. 

Realtors would agree that the most difficult part of the transaction begins when the negotiating is done, the contract is signed and we are moving toward that closing table. Inspections, appraisals, lender requirements, buyer’s remorse and seller’s change of mind all have the potential for derailing a transaction and creating stress for all involved. I don’t want to live in stress. I choose not to. And thus my attitude toward real estate has shifted as well. Things can and do go awry. I have no control over most of those things. I do have control over how I respond and how I help my clients respond. 

Today brought the perfect awareness of how much I’ve shifted. We are one week away from closing and a surprise popped up. The kind of surprise that can upset buyers, sellers and agents. The kind of surprise that can hijack a transaction. The other agent was not at fault and did her job well, communicating the issue to me and helping her clients to understand what was happening. I talked to my clients, and back into negotiations we all went. Back and forth phone calls and discussions ensued. 

These situations, this close to meeting at the closing table, used to set me on edge and create anxiety. I wouldn’t  communicate that to my clients but internally, the battle would begin…and the desperate questions: How do I hold this deal together? What should I do, promise, manipulate or try to control, to make this happen? And then my mind would go crazy, sorting through possible solutions, creating stress. 

This has happened less and less the last two years. And today, not at all. I handled what was before me to handle, to the best of my ability, without resorting to the past (this is bad when this happens) or projecting anxiously into the future (the what ifs). When I had done what needed doing, I let it rest with the other agent. The day wasn’t ruined. I wasn’t fretting. My mind wasn’t churning. When silence stretched out between phone calls with the other agent, I brought my attention to the present moment and enjoyed what was going on right then, without allowing my mind to create stories about what that silence meant. 

How amazing was the peace that surrounded me. One of my sentences to live by this year has been, “I am open to everything, and attached to nothing.” I did what I could, as well as I could, and let go of the outcome, believing that whatever happened at this point, was supposed to happen. Whatever happened, even if the deal came apart, I’d handle it as it appeared and help my clients to do the same. I chose to stay open, stay unattached to the outcome, and let things unfold. 

I had a delightful late lunch with my granddaughter and was on my way to see one of my grandsons, when a call came in. It was the other realtor. She was laughing. “I have good news for you!” And she did. There was a third party error. A simple mistake. All was well. No further negotiations were necessary. I had the joy of passing that news on to my clients. And then it was on with my day. I acknowledged the way my life has shifted and opened up. And expressed gratitude. And smiled. 

I no longer wonder if real estate is incompatible with the journey I am taking. There is joy in what I am doing. There is trust that all is unfolding exactly as it should. I’ll practice real estate until the moment that I no longer do. I’ll know when that is.