This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my Disclosure Policy for details
I am letting you in on a secret of mine. I’ve not spent much time in the company of women, aside from my family. Oh, I’ve had a few select female friends during my life, although I naturally gravitated toward male friendships. Sometimes the girls in school were just too dramatic for me. I made the unusual choice, in high school, to not date classmates, preferring instead to build friendships. I don’t regret that choice. It took pressure off of all of us.
However, in recent years I realize what I have missed, shunning the company of women. Although I am by nature a solitary person, who is never bored in my own company, I’m learning to deeply appreciate the sisterhood that exists among women of all ages, all colors, all nationalities, all backgrounds.
Yesterday a Facebook friend tagged me in a challenge, that I accepted. It arrived at a time when I am considering what it means to support and encourage the women in my life, from family and friends to dear souls I’ve never met in person but have a friendship with, nonetheless.
Her post began with the words… Fix her crown.
Facebook Challenge Fix Her Crown
My Facebook friend Gizelle tagged me, and many other women, in a post with the following instructions:
FIX HER CROWN
I choose not to cry, and dwell in a state of pity, stagnation or despair. I’ve felt the pain of being knocked down but I survived. I am still standing. As a result I choose to be part of the uplifting, development and construction of my life sisters.
If I have not tagged you please take no offense. I tried to choose people I thought would make this challenge a priority and keep it going for the Sisterhood.
Too often, women find it easier to criticize each other instead of building each other up. With all the negativity and pettiness out there, let’s choose positivity!
Upload 5 pictures of yourself… just you!!!! Then tag beautiful women to do the same. (FB allows tagging of up to 50 people at one time). Thank you for the tag (fill in name of person who tagged you).
Gizelle, a bright, beautiful and spirited woman, had no idea that I’ve been pondering the importance of sisterhood, which is defined as a community of women linked by a common interest. Nor did she know that those words, Fix Her Crown, had significance for me as well.
I accepted the challenge and I’ll post my five photos on Facebook and Instagram tonight. With the deeper stirrings that I felt, a blog post seemed appropriate too. I’m including in this post the five photos I’ll be sharing on social media, with brief captions explaining why I chose each photo.
Fix Her Crown Meme
Lately I’ve seen a meme that snags my attention every time it pops up. Perhaps because my symbol this year is the Queen chess piece, or perhaps because I am becoming the Queen of my own kingdom, the imagery behind the following words enchants me:
“Be the woman who fixes another woman’s crown, without telling the world that it was crooked.” Unknown
I love that. The words call to something being born within me. This kind of woman accepts, encourages and supports her sisters. When she sees something she can help with, she does so quietly, without making a big deal about it or broadcasting to the world that her sister needed help.
In a time when division is rampant in the world, expressing kindness by “fixing her crown” feels so important. It’s not about fixing the woman. I’m not so bold to think I can fix people. This is about helping in a situation or offering an encouraging word or coming alongside for a time. It’s about raising awareness so I notice when a sister’s crown has slipped and then quietly offering without expecting anything in return.
How Do We Fix Each Other’s Crowns?
So how do we fix her crown, without telling the world it was crooked? How do we focus on offering rather than correcting or worse, condemning?
I came up with these ideas:
- Watch for the sister whose crown seems too heavy. She might be the mom struggling to load groceries and kids into the car. Or the one who runs out of quarters at the vending machine. Lend a helping hand and offer a cheerful word.
- Notice the sister who dares to be her own gloriously unique self, no matter what anyone thinks or says. Applaud her. Leave her an appreciative note or give her a thumbs up.
- Raise strong young women. Preteen and teenage girls, on the way to their queendom, need encouragement and positive role models. They also need to hear how important it is to take responsibility for their own lives and happiness. Come alongside. Tell your stories.
- Smile at the sister who seems to be journeying alone. Invite conversation and then listen. Be a friend.
- Stand with the sister whose crown has been knocked off her head over and over again. Offer her acceptance and dignity and grace and a safe space in which to share and grow.
- Be your own beautiful, shining self. I think one of the best ways we can help each other is to live our lives as the best versions of ourselves. Me happily being me allows you to happily be you. No comparisons or judgements. No tearing down. We build each other up. We link arms and journey together.
Fix Her Crown Extended Challenge
As an extension of the challenge presented to me, I offer it to you. If you are a sister, please consider this your invitation to share five photos of yourself. Just you in the photos. As women we often find it hard to take photos of ourselves or be the subject of a photograph. Take this opportunity to shine.
Post your photos on social media or if you are a blogger, create your own Fix Her Crown post. I’d love to see your photos and read your thoughts about encouraging and supporting the sisterhood.
And my Sisters, know I am here, a woman with a listening ear and an open and nonjudgmental heart. Queens fix each others crowns. And we are all Queens.
Cindy Goes Beyond is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. This affiliate program is designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com, all at no extra cost to you.