Rebuild Your Life

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June is Rebuild Your Life Month. The topic of rebuilding or making changes to life is crucial to me so I scheduled myself to write a blog post on the subject this month.

As often happens, when I make a decision and move toward it, life brings me other things that align with that intention. The day approached for writing this post and I discovered a quote by Mary Anne Radmacher. Reading the quote, I realized how beautifully her words provide a blueprint for rebuilding a life.

The quote:

“Live with Intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.”

Those words make perfect bullet points, for rebuilding your life and creating the life of your dreams.

Rebuild Your Life title meme

The History of Rebuild Your Life Month

Observed each year in June, Rebuild Your Life Month encourages us to take time to reflect on life. Is it all that we hoped it would be? If not, it’s never, ever too late to make changes and live a different life.

The desire to rebuild a different life often arises after a life changing event. Losing a loved one or a job, going through a divorce or reaching a milestone birthday can shake up life and cause us to reflect on where we are on the journey.

Donald Etkes, PhD, created Rebuild Your Life Month as an opportunity for adults who were neglected and/or abused as children to realize their self worth and discover their inner power. The month long celebration shifted to encourage everyone to delve into their hearts, minds and souls to uncover truths and experience personal growth. All people, from all walks of life, can change their lives, if they desire to.

Rebuild Your Life

Sharing from experience, I know that any kind of change can feel scary. Even if life feels dull, boring or too routine, if that’s what you are accustomed to, moving beyond that comfort zone feels threatening. Check out my posts on going beyond fear, comfort zones and limiting beliefs, for foundational work that may make creating change easier.

How do you know if it’s time to rebuild your life? You feel bored, restless, trapped, unfulfilled, lonely, angry, invisible or deeply unsatisfied with life.

I can tell you the exact moment when I knew it was time to rebuild my life. After many years of people pleasing and placing expectations on others that went unfulfilled, I sat on the edge of my bed one night, overcome by despair. Although I was married with a family that I adore, I felt lonely, restless and invisible. That’s the night I decided to make changes. That’s when I determined to know myself in a deeper way, be present with myself and uncover my long hidden gifts. The rebuilding began on a night when despair finally prompted me to look within.

Using Mary Anne’s wise words as stepping stones, here are ways to rebuild your life, whether you are making minor shifts or starting over completely.

Rebuild Your Life edge
Rebuild Your Life – walk to the edge

Live with Intention

By definition, intention is a goal, purpose or aim that guides life decisions. Living with intention provides an expansive roadmap for living each day. For example, setting an intention of living healthier guides the decisions you make daily, for attaining that goal.

To intentionally build a life you love, you must know what intentions best inspire and guide your life. And to discover those intentions, you must know yourself. This is where your inward journey begins. Know yourself deeply. And know what you desire to do with your life. Get quiet. Spend time alone and in reflection. Journal about your thoughts, dreams, hopes and intentions.

What fears come up? Write about those too and face them, eliminate them. What brings you incredible joy? Those are arrows pointing to your purpose. Once you know your intentions for the life you are rebuilding, you can create a personal manifesto, write daily goals in your planner or create a vision board for this part of your journey.

Walk to the Edge

Walking to the edge of your comfort zone is the only way to then go beyond it. How do you know when you are at the edge? You feel the discomfort, the fear, the uneasiness about taking the next step. As I shared in the post going beyond comfort zones, in that familiar space you feel less anxious and more in control of life. However, the truth is you cannot control life or circumstances. It’s a false feeling of security.

And most damaging, the comfort zone becomes a cage, keeping you small. Growth can’t occur in that confined space. Life feels stagnant, boring and without purpose.

To rebuild a new life you must willingly take that step over the edge. Nothing new happens until you do. That might mean using gifts you long ago abandoned, accepting another career path, radically improving relationships or trying new experiences. Every time you come up against the edge of your ever expanding life, you go beyond again…and again.

Rebuild Your Life intention
Rebuild Your Life – living with intention

Listen Hard

Listening is a skill everyone can improve. How many times have you lost track of a conversation because you are so busy thinking about what you are going to say that you don’t hear what the other person said?

Listening goes beyond hearing what another is saying. It includes taking in the information, understanding the message and feeling empathy. Listening well builds trust, reduces miscommunication and helps to eliminate conflict and resentment.

Additionally, listening to your own inner voice is important in rebuilding your life. Learn to listen to your deep inner knowing, your intuition and those Divine nudges. Such listening is often the first step toward the action that creates change.

Practice Wellness

Wellness is the active process of raising awareness and making choices that support a healthy and fulfilling life. It encompasses more than preventing illness or eating a healthy diet. It’s a process that includes change, growth and a commitment to living the best life possible. Wellness is something to actively pursue, through awareness, goals and daily habits.

In my own life, I discovered that as I rebuilt my life, I felt drawn to create a healthier lifestyle, which profoundly affected the rest of my life. Wellness flows through every aspect of life. Choosing to adopt a healthier lifestyle positively impacts making other life changes as well. As a result of my own changes, I became more eco-conscious and more aware of how my actions create positive or negative ripples in my life and on the earth.

As you rebuild your life…or start all over…what wellness practices naturally add to the new you? Or think of it this way. How would rebuilding your health impact your life? Consider eating healthier, starting a yoga or meditation practice or increasing daily activity. For more help in the wellness area, visit my other blog, Journey With Healthy Me.

Rebuild Your Life wellness
Rebuild Your Life – practice wellness

Play with Abandon

Play is how children figure out life. Using their imaginations, playing make believe and playfully exploring their worlds is how they learn.

As you grew older, did you stop playing as a form of learning?

Reconnecting with your playful side is a powerful way to help rebuild a life you love. Playing lowers inhibitions, ramps up creativity and opens up fresh opportunities. Play games that involve randomness, to increase trust in the goodness of life, people and God. Have outrageous fun. Learn more about yourself with the GROK Your World cards. Go on adventures with the Adventure Challenge sets. Play with your kids or grandkids. Make play an important part of your daily life.

Laugh

There is a strong connection between laughter and happiness. A good laugh boosts mood and creativity, clears brain fog and sharpens focus, improves relationships and creates a better quality of life, especially for older adults.

When life feels too small, too constrained and dreary, bring more laughter into your life as one of the building blocks of a more expansive way of living. Watch funny movies or videos. Smile more, to shift the brain into seeing the humor in life. Tell funny stories and listen to the hilarious tales of others. Learn to laugh at yourself and life’s circumstances.

Rebuild Your Life fun
Rebuild Your Life – play with abandon

Choose with No Regret

Regret is a heavy feeling of sadness, repentance or disappointment, over something that happened or over a missed opportunity.

To make life choices with no regrets, first reflect on experiences, take ownership of your choices and then let go of the past. Build a life without regrets. Choose what YOU want to do. Go after those dreams. Accept opportunities. A life lived without regret is one that goes beyond playing it safe and staying small. Creating a life you love means you step up, live with purpose and set goals that challenge you, a little or a lot.

Make decisions that align with the life you are creating. Do you long to travel? Make choices that reflect that. Say yes to the trip. Accept the invitation to accompany a friend on her travels. Visit a neighboring city.

Ask yourself, frequently, will I regret this if I don’t do it? If the answer is yes, then make it happen.

Appreciate Your Friends

I add to this, appreciate all the people that contribute positively to you. Life is a journey to share. Express sincere gratitude to family members, friends, teachers, colleagues and peers for the ways they add meaning to your life.

Form a core group of people, often called a tribe, of like minded, like hearted people. Share ideas. Encourage each other to grow. Have fun together.

And for those people who are no longer in your life, for whatever reason, thank them for the lessons they taught…and let them go. Send them love and light, forgive them if that’s appropriate, and keep growing as you build the life of your dreams.

Rebuild Your Life do what you love
Rebuild Your Life – choose with no regret and do what you love

Continue to Learn

Living a small life hampers growth. To shift into a more expansive life, adopt the practice of life long learning. Always learning equals always growing, shifting and changing.

As you rebuild your life, you discover new areas of interest to explore. Curiosity leads you down intriguing paths. A closed off mind harbors prejudices, judgments and criticism. A mind that is learning remains open, curious and accepting.

On my recent trip to South Carolina, I’m so proud of myself for stepping beyond the edge…and renting a car at the Charleston  airport. I’ve never done that before on my own. It was a learning experience that created greater self confidence in addition to giving me more freedom.

Do What You Love

Perhaps one of the best benefits of rebuilding your life is discovering more about what you love to do. The better you know yourself, the more you know what you love…and what you don’t love.

Let go of the things you no longer enjoy. Embrace what you love and bring more of that into your life. Doing what you love is one aspect of choosing with no regret. The two are linked. As you live with intention and purpose and set goals, choose the things that move you closer to doing what you love.

As you grow and change, what you love to do may shift as well. Your love of baking cookies for your friends may transform into a love of creating a totally different kind of home based business.

Your desires, the things you most love to do, are always an indicator of what your purpose is. Follow those desires.

Live as if This is All There Is

I’m not talking about ignoring the afterlife here. I personally believe my soul is eternal and lives on after death. We are all here on earth for a reason and it involves our growth and purpose and the good we do here and leave here when we pass on.

Someone once told me that life is heaven’s waiting room. I disagree with that. Have you ever spent time in a waiting room? Is there anything more wearisome than waiting…and waiting…and waiting?

No, life isn’t meant to be wearisome. Life on earth is meant to be lived, fully and abundantly.

Build a life that is lived in the here and now, with great love, joy and intention. Really LIVE, making each day memorable. Have no regrets. Don’t wait for things to happen. Make them happen. Dream big dreams and put action with those dreams to birth them into reality. Feed your soul, expand your mind, live from your whole heart.

Rebuild Your Life live
Rebuild Your Life – Live, really live

Rebuild, Again and Again

I am not the same person who once sat on the edge of her bed, staring at the wall. That night, I realized circumstances didn’t need to change, I needed to. And I have. I rebuilt my life into one that more closely aligned with who I really was and in the process discovered so much joy, purpose, passion and creativity.

Since then, I’ve rebuilt my life several times, as I continue to grow and shift and live more authentically as myself. As long as I breathe, the changing continues. My greatest desire is to live an expansive life that not only brings me incredible happiness but positively impacts others as well.

Are you currently in rebuilding mode? Do you want to be? I hope this post inspires you to create the life of your wildest dreams. I know it is possible…and I know you can do it! Tell me how it’s going, in the comments below.

Living my best life.
Living my best life

Helpful books for the journey to being your best self:

 


 

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7 Replies to “Rebuild Your Life”

  1. I’m turning 40 in a few weeks and this was the perfect post to read as I approach this milestone. I feel like I need to live with intention than never before… And do what I love because who knows how much time I’ll get to do that.

  2. These are powerful guidelines to rebuild your life. Great reminders on how to live your best life with intention without regrets.

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