Fix Her Crown

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I am letting you in on a secret of mine. I’ve not spent much time in the company of women, aside from my family. Oh, I’ve enjoyed several female friendships during my life, although I naturally gravitate toward male friends. Sometimes the girls in school were just too dramatic for me. Therefore, I made the unusual choice, in high school, to not date classmates, preferring instead to build friendships. I don’t regret that choice. It took pressure off of all of us.

However, in the past few years I realize what I have missed, shunning the company of women. Although I am by nature a solitary person, who is never bored in my own company, I’m learning to deeply appreciate the sisterhood that exists among women of all ages, all colors, all nationalities, all backgrounds.

Recently a Facebook friend tagged me in a challenge, that I accepted. It arrived at a time when I am considering what it means to support and encourage the women in my life, from family and friends to dear souls I’ve never met in person but have a friendship with, nonetheless.

Her post began with the words… Fix her crown.

Fix Her Crown

Facebook Challenge Fix Her Crown

My Facebook friend Gizelle tagged me, and many other women, in a post with the following instructions:

FIX HER CROWN

I choose not to cry, and dwell in a state of pity, stagnation or despair. I’ve felt the pain of being knocked down but I survived. I am still standing. As a result I choose to be part of the uplifting, development and construction of my life sisters.

Too often, women find it easier to criticize each other instead of building each other up. With all the negativity and pettiness out there, let’s choose positivity.

Upload five pictures of yourself… just you. Then tag beautiful women to do the same.

Gizelle, a bright, beautiful and spirited woman, had no idea I’ve been pondering the importance of sisterhood, which is defined as a community of women linked by a common interest. Nor did she know that those words, Fix Her Crown, have significance for me as well.

I accepted the challenge. With the deeper stirrings that I felt, a blog post seemed appropriate too. Included in this post are the five photos I shared on social media, with brief captions explaining why I chose each photo.

Fix Her Crown
This Harley Davidson shirt belonged to my dad, who passed away nine years ago. I love that I can wear his shirt and feel close to him. There’s a bigger story behind this photo. Read it HERE.
Fix Her Crown
One of my favorite photos, taken in front of Eilean Donan Castle in the Highlands, Scotland. It captures my love of traveling and of Scotland especially. The shirt says, “You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.” Rumi

Fix Her Crown Meme

Lately I’ve seen a meme that snags my attention every time it pops up. Perhaps because my symbol for 2019 is the Queen chess piece, or perhaps because I am becoming the Queen of my own kingdom, the imagery behind the following words enchants me:

“Be the woman who fixes another woman’s crown, without telling the world that it was crooked.” Unknown

I love that. The words call to something being born within me. This kind of woman accepts, encourages and supports her sisters. When she sees something she can help with, she does so quietly, without making a big deal about it or broadcasting to the world that her sister needs help.

In a time when division is rampant in the world, expressing kindness by “fixing her crown” feels so important. It’s not about fixing the woman. I’m not so bold to think I can fix people. This is about helping in a situation or offering an encouraging word or coming alongside for a time. It’s about raising awareness so I notice when a sister’s crown has slipped and then quietly offering without expecting anything in return.

Fix Her Crown
I recently received this shirt from Simply Chaffon. It reminds me that I am building a business and a kingdom. Of course there’s a story about it!
Fix Her Crown
Another favorite photo, taken in Venice, Italy. This trip represents dreams manifesting, as my grandson Dayan and I set the intention for the Italy trip five years before it became reality.

How Do We Fix Each Other’s Crowns?

So how do we fix a sister’s crown, without telling the world it’s crooked? How do we focus on offering rather than correcting or worse, condemning?

I came up with these ideas:

  • Watch for the sister whose crown seems too heavy. She might be the mom struggling to load groceries and kids into the car. Or the one who runs out of quarters at the vending machine. Lend a helping hand and offer a cheerful word.
  • Notice the sister who dares to be her own gloriously unique self, no matter what anyone thinks or says. Applaud her. Leave her an appreciative note or give her a thumbs up.
  • Raise strong young women. Preteen and teenage girls, on the way to their queendom, need encouragement and positive role models. They also need to hear how important it is to take responsibility for their own lives and happiness. Come alongside. Tell your stories.
  • Smile at the sister who seems to be journeying alone. Invite conversation and then listen. Be a friend.
  • Stand with the sister whose crown has been knocked off her head over and over again. Offer her acceptance and dignity and grace and a safe space in which to share and grow.
  • Be your own beautiful, shining self. I think one of the best ways we can help each other is to live our lives as the best versions of ourselves. Me happily being me allows you to happily be you. No comparisons or judgments. No tearing down. We build each other up. We link arms and journey together.

Fix Her Crown Award

Inspired by the challenge and the quote, and motivated by the desire to honor women who are helping other women, I created the Fix Her Crown Award for bloggers. As a reader who has found her way here, please consider this your invitation to accept the award. Check out the award post, with instructions on how to participate, HERE.

And my Sisters, know I am here, a woman with a listening ear and an open and nonjudgmental heart. Queens fix each others crowns. And we are all Queens.

Fix Her Crown
I forgot about this photo, until I came across it a couple of days ago. Happy and full of anticipation, I was trying on various outfits for an upcoming trip. I was simply enjoying the moment.

 

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Queen of Enchantment

This is a quickly written post, after a long and full day, that hasn’t left much time for creative efforts beyond the bright sparks of thought that are firing in my head. Six days ago, I awoke with a question, posed to me by the Divine.

Do you want to be the Queen of your own kingdom…or a pawn in someone else’s?

You can read the blog post about that story HERE. Since that day, much has developed in my life, around my response to that question.

Queen of Enchantment

I don’t usually share what I am about to share, until the start of a new year. However, I’m offering a peek into my uncommon life and into the process that occurs yearly for me, at about this time. Before a current year ends and a new year arrives, the Divine bestows on me a word that becomes my theme as I journey through the next 12 months. For years I thought I was choosing the word. It turns out the word is given to me, as a hint of what is to come. This year my word has been Story.

I’ve already been given the word for 2019. It arrived about a month ago. I’m breaking my own rules by sharing it now, but it feels right to do so. My word for next year is ENCHANTMENT or some variation, perhaps, of that word. I am delighted. I am inspired.

The word enchant comes from the Latin words in -“in” and cantare – “sing”. The word can mean to fill with charm or to captivate. I like living in those states of being. It can also mean to be under a spell. When I connect that definition with the root word of sing, images of Snow White and Cinderella come to mind, and animals responding to their voices as they sing.

Queen of Enchantment

I have much yet to explore about next year’s word, however you can see the possible direction that this is going.

As for my symbol, I was hoping for the Tree. It seemed to connect with Enchantment…as in enchanted forest. I’ve wanted the Tree to be my symbol for years. It’s not a tree however. When I was asked the question about being a queen or a pawn, I had no inkling that the repetitious signs were about to begin. In the last six days I’ve been inundated with images of the Queen chess piece or I have seen the word queen or I’ve heard the word in songs, commercials and movie trailers. Saturday afternoon I received the image or word queen multiple times in a very short span of time. Repetition and synchronicities are the flashing neon lights that point me in the right direction. Queen, and specifically the queen chess piece, is my symbol for 2019.

Queen of Enchantment

I am still processing information and connecting the dots. I’ll have more to share as this year winds down and a new year beckons. Initially I resisted accepting the symbol given to me. The reasons why are fodder for another blog post. I’ve accepted the symbol now, and I’m excited as I remain open so that I can receive all that I need to know about my ongoing adventure.

The words and symbols given to me each year are for my guidance, personal growth and enjoyment. They flow into one another, in a progressive way, telling the Story of my life. I’m filled with wonderment, and yes, I am enchanted, that from this year’s Story a Queen is emerging. She is me. I am her. I’m full of anticipation about where the journey is headed.

Queen of Enchantment